Forbidden Attraction
by Alternate Ego
Summary: Response to the WPBA first sentences challenge. Number 146: Well, if we're going to die, then we might as well sleep together... McWeir. Slight UST.


Number 146. Well, if we're going to die, we might as well sleep together...

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Forbidden Attraction

by Alternate Ego

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"Well, if we're going to die, we might as well sleep together," Rodney suddenly said.

Elizabeth stared at him. "Excuse me?" she said once she found her voice.

Rodney blushed, defensive. "We're stuck in a small cell, waiting to be executed by the pitiful remainders of the Hoffans for the demise of their people which, I may add, was their own doing. John and the others are also stuck in a cell who-knows-where, and Atlantis doesn't expect us to come back home in less than five hours. No rescue is coming, and I don't see a way out of this. You asked what we should do. I say we - "

"Yes, I got that part!" Elizabeth interrupted, in order to prevent him from saying it again. She winced at the very thought of the words. "And no. We are not going to – sleep together."

"Why not?" Rodney challenged. "In case you've forgotten, you admitted fairly recently to being in love with me. Besides, I've noticed that we've always shared a certain chemistry with each other - "

Elizabeth closed her eyes and begged the Ancients for patience and just a little self-restraint. "Rodney."

"Yes?"

"We are not going to sleep together because we're _not _going to die."

"Oh." He seemed to deflate at this. "Why?"

"Because you're going to find a way out of this cell," Elizabeth said.

He blinked. "I am?"

"Yes. You are."

"And if I don't?"

Elizabeth sighed. "Then we, along with John, Ronon and Teyla, will die a painful death by the hands of the Hoffans."

Rodney flinched. "Painful? Do you think it'll be painful?"

"Well, they seemed pretty angry. It seems likely that they'll try and draw it out a little," Elizabeth said, playing on Rodney's fear of pain.

"Hmm." Rodney was silent for a few moments. "But then we'll sleep together."

With great difficulty, Elizabeth resisted the urge to bury her head in her hands and groan. Why hadn't the Hoffans put her in a cell alone? Why? "Rodney, there will be no sleeping together. Period. Now start finding a way out of this cell!"

"Fine," he said, pouting. With a scowl, he began to examine the cell.

Elizabeth rubbed her face with her hands, watching him wearily. But after only a few minutes, he stopped, leaning against the wall and glaring at her.

"What?" she asked resignedly.

"It's impossible. There's no way out," he said stubbornly. Seeing the look on her face, he added, "The walls and floors are made of thick, unmovable stones. The window is nine feet off the ground and has wide metal bars. The door is locked. And we have no tools, weapons, or objects of any kind to aid in whatever misguided, pathetic escape we may attempt."

Elizabeth looked at him hard. He tried to hold her gaze, but ended up dropping his eyes, letting her know what this was really about. Stifling a sigh, she briefly wondered at the power of this man's ego. It was amazing what it could compel him to do – or not to do.

She had a few choices. She could calmly talk to him and explain patiently that, as the expedition leader, it would be inappropriate for them to have any sort of relationship beyond friendship, and that her rejection of him was based on a professional standpoint only – not because she found him unattractive. This option would take time, which they did not have, patience, which was currently running low on her part, and careful verbal maneuvering, which she did not feel up to at the moment.

Or she could just heal his wounded ego in a moment and deal with the consequences later.

She opted for the second choice.

Taking a few quick strides forward, she grabbed the front of Rodney's jacket, and kissed him. He was too surprised to react for a moment, but was soon kissing back hotly.

Interesting, she thought. For a geek, he was a good kisser.

After a few moments, she pulled away, somewhat reluctantly. "Now," she said, looking at his still-stunned (but the smugness was not long in coming) face, "find us a way out of here."

Within a few seconds, he'd found a weak spot in the cell door's lock and had it open. There was only one guard, and together they managed to take him out easily.

Glancing at Rodney's face, she was exasperated to see the emotion displayed there. "Please don't tell me you're actually disappointed," Elizabeth said.

"Why would I be disappointed? I only missed out on the chance to sleep with an extremely beautiful and attractive woman."

"Rodney - "

"Right, right, finding the other's cells…"

The rest of their mission went smoothly. They freed Ronon, Teyla and John from their cells, sneaked out of the Hoffan's new settlement, and made it to the Stargate before their would-be captors realized they were gone.

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A knock on her office door made Elizabeth look up from her paperwork. Once she saw who it was, she had conflicting impulses to either wince or smile, and ended up doing both.

"Rodney," she said in greeting, unable to keep a hint of embarrassment from her tone. "Finished with your mission reports?"

As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she cringed. Yes, she knew she had to talk to Rodney about the…_incident_…but it didn't mean she had to look forward to it.

Rodney smirked complacently. "Yes, in fact, I have," he said. "But I had to censor it a little, as I think there was a certain occurrence that I did not think merited mentioning."

Elizabeth looked down, blushing. "Rodney - "

"No, no, that's perfectly fine, Elizabeth," Rodney interrupted, his tone so smug that it again gave her conflicting impulses (to smack him or kiss him, that was the question…good thing he wasn't in arms reach). "Your irrevocable, clandestine captivation towards yours truly is a strictly confidential secret that will never leave this room."

She gaped at him. "_What?_"

"Simply put - " Rodney paused for dramatic emphasis, his smirk growing as he leaned in closer to her – "You want me, Elizabeth. Don't be embarrassed," he said, putting up a hand to stop her from speaking, "it's perfectly understandable. After all, I am a highly desirable man. Truthfully, though, I never expected you to break decorum and reveal your private yearning. But that's alright," he continued, talking over her protests. "As I said, your secret will never leave this room. And unfortunately, I have to turn down your attentions. Not because you are unattractive in any way to me, in fact I regard you as one of the most beautiful and charismatic women I have ever met, but solely because of professional reasons. It is simply not appropriate for us to engage in a romantic relationship. I'm sorry, Elizabeth. I'm sure you understand."

Amazed, Elizabeth could only stare at him, her mind drawing a blank with what to say.

"Speechless? Yes, that can happen after a rejection," Rodney said with an air of sympathy. "But trust me, you'll come to be grateful for my decision. Now, I'm going to go get lunch. Would you like anything?"

Taken aback by his quick change of topics, she said, "No, ah – I'm just fine for now."

"Excellent. See you later." And with that, he gave her one last smirk and walked out the room.

Elizabeth sat back in her chair, still astonished. Slowly, a smile began to spread across her face as she realized what Rodney had done. He'd made sure he was the one doing the rejecting.

"That cocky son-of-a…" she muttered, the smile growing further. She wasn't sure whether she should be furious or relieved at his audacity.

Well, one thing was for sure, she mused as she turned back to her paperwork, life wouldn't be as quite as interesting without him.

--End--

A/N: I'm deeply sorry, Shweir shippers. But I kinda like McWeir too. Oh well. Also: don't make me beg you for reviews. You know what the right thing to do is.


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